Friday, July 22, 2011

Heat Chic HELL!!!

Alice + Olivia "Alameda" Printed Crepe Dress

In case you've been hiding under a rock lately, it has been damn hot in the USofA this week. Not, like, the usual "Oh, it's July, sure I'm sweaty, but I'm managing to rock that carefree, dewy look" hot, but more like, "OH MY GOD I CAN ACTUALLY FEEL MY SKIN PEELING OFF WHY IS EVERY SEAT ON THE SUBWAY WET I HOPE THAT IS LINT AND NOT A TRAPPED INSECT SWIMMING IN THE POOL OF SWEAT BETWEEN MY BOOBS."

You know, that kind of hot.

And, I originally wanted to be really lame cute and title this post "Heat Chic" to present the fabulous Alice+Olivia dress pictured above that I've been drooling over on NET-A-PORTER as the perfect hot day get-up... But then I had to sit on a stalled subway- with its doors open to cancel out any benefit of an already-shitty AC- for 15 minutes this morning because of a medical emergency on one of the cars which I'm pretty sure must have been someone fainting, and I realized that no dress, no outfit, no item of clothing period could be appropriate for battling this weather.

Sure, the A+O dress is gorgeous, not black, short, has a deep V-neck front and back, and features a print to minimize the visibility of sweat stains. But honey, that ain't gonna save you when every time you walk outside, you feel like your entire body has been bitch-slapped a thousand times over by the sun.

As much as I hate being inside among recycled air, it seems to be the only way to deal with this weather. Do you disagree? Have you found some magical item of clothing that is perfect for going outside when it's this hot, even if everyone around you is on the verge of collapsing? Please, do tell. And FedEx me ASAP.

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